Avoid Sexual Entanglements

Proverbs 5:1-23

“My son, attend unto my wisdom, and bow thine ear to my understanding: That thou mayest regard discretion, and that thy lips may keep knowledge.” (Proverbs 5:1-2)

Solomon had observed and experienced a lot of things.  He advised his readers to learn take advantage of what he had learned so they could make wise decisions, not falling for tricks or making foolish statements they would regret later.  One area of particular concern was sexual relationships.

“For the lips of a strange woman drop as an honeycomb, and her mouth is smoother than oil: But her end is bitter as wormwood, sharp as a twoedged sword. Her feet go down to death; her steps take hold on hell.  Lest thou shouldest ponder the path of life, her ways are moveable, that thou canst not know them.” (Proverbs 5:3-6)

An unfamiliar man or woman can seem like the dream mate.  It is so pleasant to listen to someone who is so impressed by ones appearance or strength that everything they say seems wonderful.  Their reasons for breaking up with their previous boyfriend or girlfriend or mate makes it clear how mistreated they were. 

Unfortunately, there is always more to the story than you were told.  The breakup was probably at least partly his or her fault, and if you get involved you will find out about the real story the hard way, trying to deal with the same thing the previous person dealt with.  The reason they separated is probably because they were unwilling to make any changes in their behavior.  As they get older they become even less willing to change.  

Besides forcing one to live with those things another found so objectionable, getting involved with such a person leads to sexual sin resulting in jealousy by previous lovers, and occasional physical attacks and attempts to kill one.  In addition it brings the judgment of God on the person for his sin. 

To keep one from finding out the truth, this person will change their behavior and stories.  Only after getting involved do they show what they are really like. 

“Hear me now therefore, O ye children, and depart not from the words of my mouth.  Remove thy way far from her, and come not nigh the door of her house: Lest thou give thine honour unto others, and thy years unto the cruel: Lest strangers be filled with thy wealth; and thy labours be in the house of a stranger; And thou mourn at the last, when thy flesh and thy body are consumed, And say, How have I hated instruction, and my heart despised reproof; And have not obeyed the voice of my teachers, nor inclined mine ear to them that instructed me!  I was almost in all evil in the midst of the congregation and assembly.” (Proverbs 5:7-14)

By avoiding entanglement with a person one doesn’t know, it is possible to escape a lot of problems.  To get involved may result in loss of respect by others or a relationship with your family, or in a lifetime of being controlled by someone who doesn’t care about you.  It may result in the loss of everything you have earned trying to keep them happy or to settle after a divorce or breakup.  The constant squabbling and emotional stress can destroy one’s physical and emotional health.

Ultimately you will find yourself wishing you had listened to those who tried to warn you about promiscuous relationships.  You will regret the effect it has had on your life and realize how far it has taken you from where you wanted to be.

“Drink waters out of thine own cistern, and running waters out of thine own well.  Let thy fountains be dispersed abroad, and rivers of waters in the streets.  Let them be only thine own, and not strangers' with thee.  Let thy fountain be blessed: and rejoice with the wife of thy youth.  Let her be as the loving hind and pleasant roe; let her breasts satisfy thee at all times; and be thou ravished always with her love.” (Proverbs 5:15-19)

Instead of running after somebody new, learn to be satisfied with what you already have.  Let your relationship with the mate you already have so others are less tempted to come onto you.  If a man or woman cheated on their first husband or wife, what makes you think they won’t cheat on you?  Do you really want to share them? 

While your relationship may not be perfect, if you are willing, both can learn to enjoy it and be satisfied.  The best relationships are the result of learning to accept and enjoy each other.  There are no perfect people out there, and looking for a perfect relationship will keep you from ever having a good one.

“And why wilt thou, my son, be ravished with a strange woman, and embrace the bosom of a stranger?  For the ways of man are before the eyes of the LORD, and he pondereth all his goings.  His own iniquities shall take the wicked himself, and he shall be holden with the cords of his sins.  He shall die without instruction; and in the greatness of his folly he shall go astray.” (Proverbs 5:20-23)

Knowing there are no perfect relationships, why would a person waste their time looking for one?  Especially since we know that God will judge every person, and he knows exactly what they have done.  Their own actions are the cause of most of people’s problems.  A person who doesn’t learn will die spiritually and emotionally, going into ever worse problems as a result of his refusal to learn.