A Cautious Approach

Genesis 43:16-34

For almost a year, Joseph had waited for his half brothers to bring his full Benjamin to Egypt, keeping Simeon in custody to ensure they would. That they waited so long must have been troubling to both Joseph and Simeon, raising doubt as to their concern for individuals. Finally they came with Benjamin ad presented themselves.

“And when Joseph saw Benjamin with them, he said to the ruler of his house, Bring these men home, and slay, and make ready; for these men shall dine with me at noon. And the man did as Joseph bade; and the man brought the men into Joseph's house.” (Genesis 43:16-17)

Almost unable to contain himself, but not wanting to expose his identity until he knew they no longer hated him, Joseph had them taken to his house to eat dinner with him.

“And the men were afraid, because they were brought into Joseph's house; and they said, Because of the money that was returned in our sacks at the first time are we brought in; that he may seek occasion against us, and fall upon us, and take us for bondmen, and our asses.” (Genesis 43:18)

Remembering the previous accusations of spying, and that the money had turned up in their sacks, the brothers were worried that the dinner was just an excuse for arresting them and making slaves of them. They began to discus ways to allay any suspicion, and decided to bring up the subject first.

“And they came near to the steward of Joseph's house, and they communed with him at the door of the house, And said, O sir, we came indeed down at the first time to buy food: And it came to pass, when we came to the inn, that we opened our sacks, and, behold, every man's money was in the mouth of his sack, our money in full weight: and we have brought it again in our hand. And other money have we brought down in our hands to buy food: we cannot tell who put our money in our sacks.

And he said, Peace be to you, fear not: your God, and the God of your father, hath given you treasure in your sacks: I had your money. And he brought Simeon out unto them. And the man brought the men into Joseph's house, and gave them water, and they washed their feet; and he gave their asses provender.” (Genesis 43:19-24)

When they described what had happened to Joseph’s manager, he told them not to worry about the money, that God had given it back to them. He treated them as guests rather than prisoners, freeing Simeon and providing the opportunity to make themselves presentable before dinner. He also fed their donkeys. When they learned they were to eat with Joseph, they brought out the present Jacob had sent, probably thanking Gd they had something to offer in appreciation.

“And they made ready the present against Joseph came at noon: for they heard that they should eat bread there. And when Joseph came home, they brought him the present which was in their hand into the house, and bowed themselves to him to the earth.

And he asked them of their welfare, and said, Is your father well, the old man of whom ye spake? Is he yet alive?” (Genesis 43:25-27)

When Joseph arrived home, they presented the present and bowed down to him, undoubtedly reminding him of the dream he’d had more than twenty years before, of his brothers bowing to him. He began to ask about their family, using the casual setting as and excuse. The brothers had no clue how vitally interested he was, suspicious of his motives yet constrained to respond to such a innocuous question.

“And they answered, Thy servant our father is in good health, he is yet alive. And they bowed down their heads, and made obeisance.

And he lifted up his eyes, and saw his brother Benjamin, his mother's son, and said, Is this your younger brother, of whom ye spake unto me? And he said, God be gracious unto thee, my son.” (Genesis 43:28-29)

Learning that his doting father was still alive caused a tremendous rush of emotion. When he was formally introduced to Benjamin, he was unable to contain himself any longer.

“And Joseph made haste; for his bowels did yearn upon his brother: and he sought where to weep; and he entered into his chamber, and wept there. And he washed his face, and went out, and refrained himself, and said, Set on bread. “ (Genesis 43:30-31)

Retreating to his room, trying to make it look like he was just getting ready for dinner, Joseph surrendered to his emotions. Finally composing himself, he washed up and returned to his role as host.

“And they set on for him by himself, and for them by themselves, and for the Egyptians, which did eat with him, by themselves: because the Egyptians might not eat bread with the Hebrews; for that is an abomination unto the Egyptians. And they sat before him, the firstborn according to his birthright, and the youngest according to his youth: and the men marvelled one at another.” (Genesis 42:32-33)

Egyptian society had a very strict class system, and while it was necessary to communicate between classes, social interaction was discouraged, much like the separation of officers and enlisted men in our military. The segregation was so strong that as a ruler, Joseph could not even eat with his servants. To avoid antagonizing the Egyptians, he couldn’t eat with that bunch of foreigners, and the Egyptians wouldn’t.

“And he took and sent messes unto them from before him: but Benjamin's mess was five times so much as any of theirs. And they drank, and were merry with him.” (Genesis 43:34)

Any class conscious society emphasizes the superiority of the “upper” class. One way of doing this was to have the food brought to the head table and then portions sent to the different individuals, as the head table deigned to feed them. Favor and disfavor could thus be demonstrated by what was served to each individual. Joseph couldn’t help himself, sending five times as much for Benjamin as for the others.

Many times people assume hesitation to renew a relationship indicates a lack of forgiveness. Joseph had forgiven his brothers, but he was not willing to foolishly expose himself to further hurt. He was just being cautious. It would be foolish not to be careful until sure of ones acceptance. Trust still has to be rebuilt.